Well if that is at all possible for a funeral, I have to say I think my mum had one.
T and I had travelled up to Yorkshire on Sunday 9th February ready for her funeral on Monday 10th.
Walking into my mums house, was to say the least, very emotional this time. All previous visits had been a total whirlwind of trips to the hospital, constant phone calls to various folk and visits from carers etc.
Looking around this time, I found myself fixating on her treasured collection of ornaments, paintings and photos, that were ‘my mum’ They’d always been part of her home, though I’d never really noticed them before. Now here they were, crying out for her to look at them and dust them. In an odd sort of way, they looked lost and alone.
Deb, our younger daughter arrived soon after, breaking my thoughts.
We’d booked the Travellers Rest for after the funeral service, so decided we’d pop there for something to eat, and to make sure everything was in hand.
I’d also done a montage of photos of mums life, and wanted to make sure they could display them somewhere.
Next day, we headed to Harrogate Crematorium for the 12.20pm service.
I had painful memories of my dad’s funeral cars doing the drive from house to crematorium fourteen years ago, so I’d chosen to meet the funeral car there. The journey still wasn’t pleasant, but I felt happier going at a more normal speed without the obvious stares that a funeral cortège attracts.
The crematorium was full, many faces I didn’t know, but all friends of mum who’s paths she had crossed during her lifetime.
The service was performed by Jim the hospital chaplain, a truly lovely person who I’d met for the first time at my mums bedside.
He’d asked me questions about mum a couple of days after she passed away, so he could get a feel for the type of person she was. The eulogy he spoke, in his gentle Geordie lilt was so beautiful and heartfelt.
I’d chosen a couple of songs from a Susan Boyle CD, who I knew my mum liked.
‘Wild Horses‘ (actually a Stones song) for the processional music and ‘How Great Thou Art‘ for the recessional music. With the firm favourite ‘Jerusalem’ sung by a choir mid service.
After the service we headed for the Travellers Rest for the wake.
The montages I’d made were displayed around the room and they’d put on a beautiful spread of food.
Everyone was mingling with each other and chatting with memories of my mum, even Jim the chaplain turned up. The atmosphere was lovely with a warmth of feeling everywhere.
Deb raised a glass in celebration of my mums life, and everyone reciprocated with a hearty and resounding ‘KATH’
Yes, if a funeral can be good, my mums definitely was.
Click on the four small images above to see the photo montages.
Mum (1929-2014) & Dad (1920-2000) how I like to remember them